How to keep your dreams alive (and avoid self-sabotage)

When life gets challenging, or when you aren't seeing the fruits of your labour, it can feel incredibly disheartening and demotivating. Your mind may start to go into overdrive, and self-sabotage starts to kick in. "What if this is a ridiculous dream?" or "no one wants to hear this, I'm talking into the void" or "this isn't for me". I hear you - I've been there, many times. AND I've also manifested some remarkable things (such as living location free and being the boss of my own time, or calling in the man of my dreams).

Perhaps I could show you my strategy to keep my Dreams alive?

Make your inner decision, your Inner YES

Sometimes when we are uncertain, we can waver in our decisions - we start to play with a yes to this, maybe to that, or yes to this with x, y, z modification. This is fine, and part of the creative process. However once you have decided that this is a dream you truly love, then make the decision to yourself, and say yes!

In December last year, I dreamt of creating a home with another woman in her 30s or 40s. It is a home where I feel nourished and I can be who I am. I can see the home - right down to the beautiful pink cushions and the couch I'm sitting on. Next week, I'm moving in! (it's now January)

The Universe loves Clarity - the clearer your dream is, the easier it is for her to bring it to life.

FEEL your Dream

We often think or visualise our Dream. This is important and powerful, however when we connect with our feelings, we bring a next-level activation to our Dreams. Remember when you were a child, and you felt a huge level of excitement and joy when you really desired an ice cream on a hot day? And when an adult handed you that ice cream, your world was suddenly magical, you were invincible because your dream came alive?

Feeling your Dreams as we get older is like that. When we connect with how we feel in our dream, it becomes a part of us - our cells, and it motivates us further to bring this to life.

Into our Reality.

Girl sitting and laughing - Photo by Jonathan Borba on Unsplash

Small Steps

Taking small steps every day is a great way to connect with your dreams without feeling overwhelmed by the process. By chunking down your dreams into small, daily tasks, it helps to make it feel more achievable and builds up your confidence. A Dream isn't supposed to remain as a big nebulous 'thing' that one day you hope to have in your life, there are ways to make it smaller, and more achievable. The small steps remind you and connect you to your Dream.

9 years ago, I went to Argentina to study Tango. My dream was to have a delicious time on the dance floor (tangasms, as I used to call them). BUT... I hated the music!! The scratchy Golden Age music (late 1930s to 1950s) didn't appeal to my 32yo ears. And as you know, it's hard to dance without appreciating the music. So, as I walked around Buenos Aires, I played tango music until I started to at least not hate it. I learnt to recognise the beat, rhythm, characteristics of different orchestras, and their flavours. This transmuted into my body and my intuition started to kick in to connect with the music. 9 years on, my heart beats faster every time I walk up the stairs to a milonga (tango social) as I hear the music. Every. Single. Time.

How does it apply to your Dream? See if you can create little projects within your Dream - if you wish to fly a plane, then are there books you can read, people you can follow and talk with, explore the types of planes available.

Jean at tango, 5 years later

Surround yourself those who see you. Who believe in you.

Who we choose to surround ourselves with makes a real difference in our lives. There is a saying "you are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with", and this is so true. Allow yourself to be with those who believe in you and see your potential perhaps more than you can see it yourself (we are often more harsh on ourselves and we can't see our blindspots - more on that another time).

Share your dream with them, and ask them to be your accountability buddy.

Connect with those who are just a few steps ahead of you

It's inspiring to look to people who have achieved wonderful big dreams, however it can also be discouraging (just look at social media!). Seeing where they are at and where you are now can be disheartening, and we often do so without knowing their journey. However, connecting with people who are just a few steps ahead can give you a source of inspiration and it can feel less daunting to approach them with questions and ask for advice. Connecting with people who are slightly ahead of you can give a powerful boost and motivation when you perhaps need it the most.

Daily Practice

A daily practice can be a great tool to ground yourself and connect with your Dreams. It doesn't have to be complex - simply take a few moments each day to be with your chosen practice - whether it be stillness meditation, movement, gratitude practice, journalling or painting each day.

Personally, I have 2 practices - a 10min feminine energy practice to connect with my body and my feelings, and a 5min practice with my boyfriend - to connect with each other, usually over zoom as we live 600km from each other. I'm also playing with a 3rd practice using the Silva Method to live more by my intuition which is part of my 2023 Dream.

My suggestion - make it fun and do-able so that it becomes something you look forward to rather than dread - add aromatherapy oils, play a soothing soundtrack, light some candles - whatever works for you!

Jean in red dress in nature, daily practice feminine energy

Parting Words

Our Dreams start within our Inner Yes, and our feelings connected with the Dreams. Bringing in small daily practices and breaking it down into achievable projects help to keep us aligned with our Dreams. Surround yourself with those who see beyond today and believe in your potential. Connect with those who are a few steps ahead of you. Most importantly, be kind to yourself and don't beat yourself up when things seem to not go the way you intended. Instead, see this as an opportunity to bring some curiosity into your Dream, your Life and your Growth journey.

What is one thing you are committing to today, to keep your dream alive?

Tell me - I'd love to hear from you!